Trying to Find the Words

I hate this. I'm in a constant state of writer's block. I have no rhythm in my writing anymore. My grammar and punctuation placement has become worse this semester, despite the significant strides that were made in my writing last semester. I wish I knew what I could do to help break this quandary on my writing, but nothing has worked. I tried to just type out random statements on essay's, but this has not worked. I have tried listening to some favorable music to help myself get in the rhythm of writing, as this method did not work.

I feel and know that I can write, but the constant amount of mistakes that I continue to make is truly unforgivable. After surviving Professor Quill's class last semester, I believed that my writing had reached a new level that was untouchable, but this has turned out to be false. The reasons why this has become a false belief, involves what happened in class last week. The activity involved the entire class and the faulty sentences from everyone's blogs, which as a class we were required to correct. Let's just say that I had more than one entry in this activity. This went as far to include two of my own faulty sentences, which were listed right next to each other. I was constantly shaking my head in embarrassment, as I continued to identify my lackluster sentences. I really had thought by this time in my college career that I could write, but this once positive mindset about my writing has now greatly deteriorated. The fact is I have no excuse for my macabre writing efforts. There is still much work to be done, before I can even consider my writing to be up to the level that it was up to last year.

I love writing and all of the positive opportunities that it provides to express my ideas, concerns, and anything else on my mind. I vow that for the rest of the semester that I will edit my older posts, and will contribute more blog entries, so that I can continue to develop my writing. I'm thankful that my Professor sent me this wake up call.

Justice Was Not Served

I'm in shock, and I remain even more confused since the end of the 2009 World Series. The World Series this year was between the New York Yankees and the Philadelphia Phillies. It is hard to imagine that this one man, who cheated the game of baseball would have the opportunity to celebrate the end of a season with a World Series title. The person that I speak of is Alex Rodriguez.

Before this season had started. Mr. Rodriguez admitted to using performing-enhancing drugs to give himself an ever greater advantage to dominate his profession. It is a given that Rodriguez was a Hall of Famer before he had started to use performance enhancing drugs in 2001. Rodriguez would eventually stop using these performing enhancing drugs in 2003. His reasoning behind these actions, all had to do with the pressure of a 10-year, 252 million dollar contract that he signed with the Texas Rangers in 2000.

Rodriguez would express his admission to ESPN reporter Peter Gammons about his use of performing enhancing drugs and the reasons behind his decision to use these substances:"When I arrived in Texas in 2001, I felt an enormous amount of pressure, felt all the weight of the world on top of me to perform and perform at a high level every day". (1)

This type of reasoning is understandable, but at the same time it does not exculpate the use of these substances. If, Rodriguez did not want the pressure of such a high stake contract, he should not have signed that brobdingnagian type of deal. Rodriguez had a choice, he knew what he was doing as he embarked on a risky procedure to help meet the high expectations of his record setting contract. It really makes me cringe when Rodriguez uses this reasoning to justify his use of performance enhancing drugs.

The fact is every single person on the face of this planet is faced with pressure, it may not be the same level of pressure, but it is still pressure. I work part-time, intern for a State Senator, and are apart of a variety of Student Organizations, but I'm not trying to cheat the system to advance my own interests. I would rather fail and live to fight for another day, than succeed and live with the constant feeling of guilt, as well as the feeling of regret for my actions.

The pressure that engulfs the average individual is a mixture of internal and external circumstances. In regards to the internal circumstances, it is based off of the decisions that we have control of. This includes having a choice at the selected situations at hand, which is basically an elective pressure. Internal pressure can, for instance, consist of joining school organizations or being apart of a school team.

On the other hand, External pressures arise from situations that we cannot control. An example of external pressure, can consist of the tough economic environment that is around today. The average worker has no control over the outside factors that are involved in the fate of their own job security. Due to these external factors, it puts additional pressure on that person to thrive in the terrible economic environment. This inability to control the outside forces only complicates the struggles of the average individual, and their desire to advance their status in the world.

However, in this case Rodriguez had internal pressures before him. He had the choice of signing that contract, and being at the center of living up to the largest contract in sports history, which would later be triumphed by a larger contract that he signed in 2007. Rodriguez had a choice in his actions to sign the contract, and he had the choice to train with integrity to live up to that contract. Still, Rodriguez decided to cheat the game of baseball.

Rodriguez did not deserve to win a ring, but I guess the unethical side of this world is allowed to prevail. This does not only go for Rodriguez, but I feel the same way about people of every profession that go about their ways to cheat the system intact.

It makes me pessimistic that once I actually enter my future profession that people are going to cheat their way to the top because of their own insecurity of failing within the system. I know that people need to survive and will do anything to advance their own well-being, but I would rather be down and out knowing that I did things the right way, than living with the continued pressing guilt to achieve my own potential success. In the end, it all comes down to making the right decision, with the choices that are available. All I can say, it is going to be a long winter, and knowing that Mr. Rodriguez has a ring will only make it harder to have faith that justice is served in our World.

Source: http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2009/baseball/mlb/02/09/arod.admits/index.html#ixzz0WFSUpYIm (1)

Where were the Parents?

Last Monday, I was in the MLK library studying with a few friends. It has now become a weekly thing where every Monday, a couple of friends and I meet up and study at MLK to try to start the week right by studying in a nice sequestered environment. The feeling of silence makes it possible to help me focus, and actually get some work done, which otherwise would be near impossible in any other situation. I just seem to have a problem of studying at home, as there are too many distractions that await, but now getting back to the story.

Just as my friends and I were finally settled in to our table on the fifth floor, suddenly the fire alarm goes off. There remained to be incessant flashing of the alarm lights, and a nice uproar of people making their way to the stairs to exit. It was hard to imagine that this was happening. I was not sure what to think, and I tried not to rush to judgement, but then about an hour later another friend of mine walks into this local coffee shop, where my friends and I were attempting to study, with some news about the fire alarm being pulled. The reason why the fire alarm was pulled was due to some kid pulling the alarm. Just as I heard that I started to feel a little bit angry at the fact that some kid destroyed my relaxing study area. Yes, I know I'm complaining just like a little kid, but when I'm struggling to find the right place to study, it makes it hard to feel any type of understanding towards the kid. It is just other people in the library were trying to do the same thing and be productive in their studies.

I know that kids will be kids, but the question I have has to do with the Parents. Where were the Parents? Why were they not watching their kid? I know that I do not have the full story, but it is still hard to understand that this kid would be able to pull the fire alarm. Pulling a fire alarm is serious business, and when it is a false alarm that can make some people very frustrated. Yes, that includes myself. However, it was a false-alarm, but I just hope for future reference that these Parents are in complete control of their kid. Kids will be kids, and life goes on. So, in this case I will stop complaining and welcome this new week, as well as new month. May November be better than October. Good luck to everyone in this critical and defining month.

A Nice Change of Pace

Pain=Happiness

People are afraid of pain.

However, I am not afraid anymore.

It felt so right, despite the circumstances.

She was worth the sacrifices.

She helped me grow, and for that I will forever be thankful.

I hope that she knows that I was sincere.

I did find her perfect in every way.

There is nothing I wanted to change.

There was a reason I fell for her, and because of this I never wanted her to change for anyone.

She was real and that was all that mattered.

Before I met her, I thought love was an illusion.

However, this illusion became reality. I then became the fool, but a fool in love, nonetheless.

No grade, no amount of money, no level of accomplishment, could trump this feeling.

I felt like I had already climbed the highest mountain or made that breakthrough discovery.

I may feel full of pain, but this is a joyful pain.

Even though it feels like my city is burning down, I remain hopeful that I will rebuild it.

This feeling of repeated shock still remains, but I will always hold her in the highest regard.

I wish her the best, she deserves the best, and whoever is lucky to be with her, better get this memo.

The reaction to your writing may sound brazen, but expressing these type of feelings should be hackneyed, and will help to create the necessary growth needed to advance in this world. Let your heart speak to the world!!

Surviving The Daily Grind

This past week I have been thinking about my future. I guess I have come to the realization that my undergrad will be done in just over the next year. I find it hard to imagine that this time spent in college has passed by so fast, and the baleful part that remains involves the upsetting job market that awaits. However, with this ever shrinking job market, I find it easy to fathom that I will be unable to find the job I want after I graduate. Still, I have come to the conclusion that no matter what job I land out of school, it will still be an irreproachable job, as it will come down to what I make out of the situation. During my time working in retail, I have come to be humbled by the fact that this job does matter, and that if I cannot handle this job, then I will not be able to handle anything that life throws my way.

So, as this job market continues to get worse, just remember that whatever job that is available, it is up to making the best out of every job situation. I know that it is easy to state this on my blog, but it all comes down to embracing the times of our struggle and making the best of it, since the climb up the mountain top will only remain steep in the future. There is a reason why all of my fellow classmates have made it this far in life, as they have persevered to handle the daily grind that has come their way. I know that in the coming years, life will only be more difficult, but it is important to remember that with the right mindset and work ethic that things will change for the better.

Procrastinating On Midterms

This procrastination has to stop. It is catching up with me. Well, there are two things I need to do in order to make this change happen. This first includes staying off the website known as Facebook. This website just has a dynamism over me, for which I'm having a problem shaking. It is quite frustrating that this website is taking time out of my life like this. It is just those pointless applications and the time I take to posting articles on my page, which takes the most time.

However, it is not the website that needs to be blamed. Only I can make the changes necessary to get past this obstacle. The other thing, which I have finally come to determine creates this procrastination is my lack of ability for me to focus when I'm at home. I'm just never able to focus, which is for a multiple amount of reasons. So, my main focus will now be to just get all my homework done at school. I know that if I actually stay a little later studying on campus, I will be able to get the work I want to get done.

The reason why I'm writing about this is because this past week I put off studying for two midterms, which were back to back, and with the same Professor. Before Monday of last week, I had done none of the reading for any of the classes and was just going off what I knew from lecture, which of all I attended. It was extremely difficult to balance studying for both midterms, as there did not seem to be enough time to internalize all the information. In order to best prepare for these midterms, I just avoided Facebook and studied at school later. The grades for these midterms are not out yet, but when I was focused at school studying, I felt I was getting something done and was beating this terrible habit.

Whatever my grades happen to turn out for these midterms, I remain hopeful that I have learned my lesson. It is climacteric that I get my studying schedule in order, and to take the necessary steps to beat this habit, instead of blaming other factors that I can control. So, now I'm off to go study for a midterm that I have this Tuesday, but if you are suffering from procrastination, spend a little time and analyze what is causing this problem, and what can be done to solve it.

Yes, I am a "Traitor"

This morning, I turned on my computer and checked the daily headlines. I was browsing around the Internet and found a very interesting story, which had to do with the International Olympic Committee (IOC) deciding on the site for the 2016 Olympic Summer Games.

There were four finalists for this event: Tokyo, Madrid, Chicago, and Rio de Janerio. The first two cities that were eliminated came to be Tokyo and Chicago. It then all came down to Madrid and Rio De Janerio. Madrid would end up being eliminated and for the first time in the history of the South American Continent, a South American country will be hosting the Olympics.

Brazil will be the second Latin American country to host the games since Mexico did back in 1968. This is a monumental occasion for the country of Brazil and the Latin America countries in the region. It will be the formal ideal situation where Brazil, like China in 2008, to showcase their rising nation.

It is now time to address my "traitor" status, which has come to hit me, since I first professed my congratulations toward Brazil for scooping up the 2016 Olympic Games. Yes, I was not in support of the Chicago obtaining the bid, it was not due to any type of anti-Midwest sentiment toward this region, but I find it hard to take this bid seriously when the division between the citizens was so tempestuous.

However, this was not the main reason why I was excited for Brazil gaining the games. My main reason has to do with the lack of site distribution that has occurred since the Modern Olympics were first started up in 1896. I was looking over some numbers and I found a disturbing disparity of how many times the U.S. has hosted the Olympics games, which was a staggering 8 times. When I saw this my jaw just dropped, and after browsing through all of the other regions of the world that got to host the Olympics, I saw no country from the South American Continent had hosted the Olympic games. So, due to this reasoning, I find it prodigious that Brazil gets to host the 2016 Olympic Games. It is about time that this booming country and growing Continent firmly get to be on the World stage to show all that they have accomplished.

So, please if you happen to be upset that Chicago didn't get the games, remember that America has been more than lucky to host the Olympic Games.